I Can Heal You
by lostinthememories
Summary: "They're nothing to be ashamed of, Gale. I have them too." Oneshot. Post-Mockingjay.


_"They're nothing to be ashamed of, Gale. I have them too."_

_"What?"_

Gale looks at the scars that cross Madge's back with a mixture of feelings. Sadness. Pain. Anger. Frustration. Disgust. "Madge..." he tries to whisper, but the words don't come out. She doesn't have as many as he does, but they're just as deep. His hands clench into fists, he still can't find the words to speak. _Say something,_ he tells himself. _Dammit, just say something!_ But before he can, she does.

"When they bombed 12," she begins, her back still to him, "they killed my parents right away. Then, since I - I was friends with Katniss, you know, they thought I had information or something. I don't know." She speaks fluidly as if telling someone else's story, like it doesn't hurt. "I wouldn't talk," she continues, with a hint of humor in her voice. Gale manages a small smile - of course Madge wouldn't talk. Never. "So this happened." She turns around to face him, crossing her arms over her bare chest. "But I got them to stop." "How?" Gale croaks. Madge breaks eye contact with him and stares at the ground. There's a long pause, before she says softly,

"How do you think?"

_"Don't shoot!" Romulus Thread's voice is hard, angry, cold. "That's the Undersee girl! Mayor's daughter? Might have something worth our time." Madge turns around to look at him. He laughs wickedly. "Hm? Do you, Princess?"_

_Madge squeezes her eyes shut. The use of the name "Princess" is what gets her. She hears it again, in someone's voice, though her thoughts are too cloudy to remember who. The voice she hears in her head is accusatory, but she knows it wasn't always like that._

_"Basement," Thread barks. _Basement? Where?_ Before she can even think, a blindfold is shoved over her eyes. She's scared. If they're not going to kill her, they've definitely got something worse planned. After what feels like hours of uncoordinated walking, the blindfold is removed. She's standing in front of the remains of the Justice Hall; there's a giant pit in front of her, a small staircase in one corner._

_"Go!" One of the peacekeepers shouts. There are three or four of them. Madge feels the cold barrel of a gun being pushed to her back, and she's being pushed towards the staircase. She walks down it, almost tripping with every step - they walk too fast. Finally, they reach the "basement." Madge swallows, hard. She is led to a small back room, nothing malicious on the surface. A dusty table. Chairs. A broken camera mounted in the corner of the cement wall._

_"Sit," Thread instructs, that wicked smile still on his lips. Madge sits. A peacekeeper reaches over to handcuff her wrist to the arm of the chair. "Don't," Thread mutters. "You're going to cooperate, aren't you, Princess?"_

_Again Madge hears the voice in her head. She still can't remember who it belongs to._

_Thread takes the seat across from Madge, and the peacekeepers stand uniformly against the wall at the opposite side of the room. Madge can't see their eyes through the tinted goggles they wear, but their mouths are pressed in firm, straight lines. "Madeline Undersee," Thread begins, and Madge finds the strength to nod. "District Twelve. Seventeen years old." Madge nods again, a little more sure this time. Maybe this won't be so bad. "Parents are -" he stops, smiles, and coughs. " - were, excuse me, Joseph and Magdalene Undersee?" Madge nods again. Sick bastard, of course he took the opportunity to rub it in her face that he killed her parents._

_"We have come to an understanding that you may have had some ties to the rebellion brewing among the districts, this District being more potent than most." She waits for him to continue, staring at the wood pattern in the table. "Miss Undersee, as the mayor's daughter, you had access to a large amount of anti-Capitol propganda, did you not?" Madge is silent. It's obvious, isn't it? After a few seconds, Thread pounds his fist down on the table, making Madge jump. She looks up at him. "Miss Undersee, this is not a game. You will answer, and if not, you are going to strongly regret it!"_

_Madge swallows again. "Yes sir, my father had anti-Capitol materials in his possession. However -" she stops, and catches her breath, holding back tears. "However, he kept them out of my disposal."_

_"Then tell me, Miss Undersee, how we found treasonous materials addressed to your father on Gale Hawthorne's person."_

_Madge freezes. The papers. She remembers vividly the nights they spent in the meadow, reading them in secret. Madge would get them out of the recycling bins, and they'd make a sort of event out if it. Once or twice these meetings ended in kisses, kisses she knew were nothing but a distraction for him. "Mr. Thread, I - I never spoke to Mr. Hawthorne." It's a lie. It's all a lie. "Oh, but Madeline," Thread croons, smiling again. His teeth are too white. Too straight. Too perfect for someone so dirty on the inside. "I think it will suit us all best if you do not lie to me, or to yourself."_

_"I never gave papers to Mr. Hawthorne," Madge insists. "He must have fished them out of the recycling bins in the back of our house." Good. She can do this._

_"Miss Undersee," Thread says quietly, "I hope you realize what you have just done. Holo!"_

_At once, one of the Peacekeepers hands Thread a small, flat, reflective device. He places it on the table and presses a small button on the side. Up comes an image that Madge can't make out at first. But then she realizes._

_Before her eyes, she sees herself, and Gale. In the meadow. They are talking, heads together, and Madge knows exactly what words are coming off their lips. Thread presses another button, presumingly to turn up the volume. Then Madge sees Gale set the paper, clearly marked "UPRISING IN EIGHT," on the ground next to them. Madge asks, "What are we going to do?" Gale brings his face closer to hers, drawing him towards her. "We're gonna give 'em hell," he whispers with a laugh. she hears Madge almost screams. It was his voice she kept hearing in her mind, his face she couldn't see. She turns her attention back to the holograph. "But no matter what, I swear, I will never let anyone hurt you." She remembers all too well what happens next - his lips press hard against hers, his hands grasping her as if she was going to disappear. They remain in this embrace for what feels like years. Before she can see him pull away, Thread turns the Holo off, and hands it formally back to the peacekeeper standing nearby._

_"Didn't your parents tell you not to lie, Madeline?" Thread asks slyly. "God damns all liars, yes?"_

_And suddenly, Madge is so _angry._ So angry that they took him away from her. So angry that he probably doesn't even think about her anymore, so angry that his lips are probably on Katniss' at any given moment. She is so angry that they took everything from her. So angry that her family is gone. So angry that they felt the need to show her these things, so angry that it's all gone. So angry that she's utterly helpless._

_So angry that she cannot speak._

_"Miss Undersee." Thread's voice is booming again. "If you do not confess to your involvement with the effort to overturn the Capitol, I hope you do understand that there are certain...consequences for your refusal to cooperate."_

_"Kill me now," Madge says. "Dammit, just get it over with. You know you want to."_

_"Oh, silly girl," Thread laughs. "'Tis a fate much worse than death. Not only is it...slower," a grin spreads across his face again, as if this is the best thing that has ever happened to him. "It's also quite a shame on your family. Your name, your dignity, all of that. I think Mr. Hawthorne knows this quite well."_

_Before Madge can question what he means, Thread looks at her again, getting too close for comfort. "Are you going to speak, Miss Undersee?" Madge stares back, with equal vigor and hatred. Then Thread pulls away, his grin almost completely fading. He turns to the men standing, seemingly emotionless, against the wall, and gives an almost imperceptible nod of his head. In a split second, they all rush towards her, grabbing her by the arms and pulling her back through a door that Madge didn't even know was there. The next thing she is aware of is that she's completely bare from the waist up and her wrists are tied to some sort of pole. _No, no, no...

_"I do hope you know that I don't want to do this, Madeline," Thread insists. "But showing mercy on rebellious little teenagers hasn't done us much good, has it?"_

_All Madge is aware of is the pain the pain the pain and how she can't cry. She can't make any noises. She can't let them win. She can't, but she does. She screams for all the times she couldn't. She screams for her parents and she screams for Gale and she screams because it fucking hurts. It feels like fire is spreading all over her skin, and she sees the blood dripping onto the floor. Her vision gets hazy and she can't do this. She can't die, because she has to stay alive for Gale. She has to go and find him, wherever he is, and tell him that he is all she cares about, all she wants anymore._

_"Wait."_

_She hears one of the men raise the whip again, but she doesn't feel it burn against her skin another time. Thread must have stopped him. "Wait," she says again, louder. "If you stop, please stop..." her vision clouds again and she can't put her words together. "Miss Undersee!" Thread yells, and his voice vibrates through her bones. "Speak!"_

_"I'm going to die!" she screams. "I'll do anything, anything if you just don't kill me. Please." She breaks down into sobs. She can't hold them back anymore; they are choking her, drowning her._

_"What are you proposing, Miss Undersee?" Thread's voice hasn't softened; it's only gotten a bit quieter._

_"You can...have me..." she coughs. A minute or so passes and she hears the men murmuring. She catches words, but she forgets what they mean. She falls asleep, or she thinks she does, and awakens when suddenly the ropes binding her to the pole snake off of her wrists and she falls backwards, hitting her head on the cement floor. She's too tired to cry out. All she knows is that it's much colder now, like she's not wearing anything at all. And then it comes again. The pain the pain the pain. Not on her back but everywhere. The pain, it hurts. She feels someone's breath on her neck; it's not warm, it's not sweet, like Gale's. It's cold and it's unforgiving. Tears sting at her eyes; every time she thinks it's gone, the pain again returns, and she feels like her skin is being torn from her bones. It's a haze, it never stops. Pain, tearing, crying, someone's cold lips somewhere that aren't Gale's. But the pain. The pain radiating everywhere, down her legs and up into her stomach. And when she thinks it's over, after what seems like a thousand years, it actually is._

_She opens her eyes. The peacekeepers, along with Thread stand with their backs to her, putting their jackets on. She shudders. "Thank you, Miss Undersee," Thread says without turning back to her. "I will not report your acts of treason to President Snow. So long as you stay out of trouble, I think we can put this behind us, yes?"_

_Then she hears the shuffling of boots, and the clicking of a door being shut. She tries to sit up, but realizes how that will end, and lays back down. Her clothes are folded in a pile a few feet away. How considerate. There's blood everywhere, on her back and shoulders, and on her thighs. She attempts to sit up again, slowly. She can't stand up, it hurts. All she can do is put her pants back on, right leg, left leg. Then she reaches for her shirt. Right arm, left arm. She lays back down in a half-dry pool of her own blood and patiently awaits the everlasting sleep she wants so badly to come._

Gale rushes forward, holding Madge tightly in his arms, falling back onto his bed. He holds her so tight he's sure she can't breathe, but he only grips harder. She cries out his name, and he snaps back to reality, loosening his grip. He pulls a blanket over the both of them and can't hold back the tears in his eyes, the sobs in his throat. She buries herself in his chest, his skin burning.

"I'm so, so, so sorry Madge," he chokes out. "I-I left you, I let them fucking touch you!"

"No, Gale," she says gently, grabbing his face so he looks at her. "It's not your fault. I...I had to. Or they'd have killed me."

"Because I didn't come and get you!" he yells. "Dammit, Madge! Why do you even love me? I..."

"Gale," Madge says again, a new sadness in her eyes. "I...it doesn't matter to me. The pain, it was nothing. The only reason it bothers me," she takes a deep breath, "is that I...I didn't want them to take that from me."

He knits his eyebrows, waiting for her to explain. "I wanted to save that for someone I loved," she says, her voice cracking. "I wanted to save that for you."

"And it's all my _fault_," he whispers. "Madge, you matter so much to me! You weren't just a distraction! I have loved you for _so long._" The desperation in his voice resonates in her bones. "I feel like a fucking idiot for making you think you were just a distraction. Madge..."

"Gale, stop," she takes his fingers and laces them with her own. "Stop. I know that now. I love you. I love you so damn much, Gale. And I feel like such a bad person for letting this happen, letting you think it was your fault. It wasn't. It was either that or...I would have died."

"I'm so sorry," he whispers against her neck, his hands moving everywhere across her smooth skin. "They didn't take anything from you, Madge," he tells her, a new certainty to his voice. "You're still whole. You're still mine. Whatever...whatever happened to you before, none of that - none of that counts. It doesn't matter." Madge doesn't know how to respond. Just when she opens her mouth to try, he says again, "You're still mine."

He pulls her further into his embrace. Her hands find his back, tracing his own scars, more numerous than her own. He places his hand across her back, too, and it almost spans the whole width. He touches her scars lightly, afraid to hurt her, but of course, he doesn't. They stay like this, Madge assuring him that it wasn't his fault, and Gale assuring, and showing, Madge that she is still his, that they didn't take anything from her. They can't take back the past, but they can heal.

And this time, when he tells her, "I'll never let anyone hurt you," she knows without a doubt that it's true.


End file.
